It is worth noting that no mater what someone does in ones professional life, no matter how successful, be wise and plan ahead for days like this. I guess insurance always looks like a rip-off at the time, but it is with 20-20 hind site....well you know the rest.
I remember once, when I was in post secondary school, I was having a particularly rotten day. I must have been trying to win someones affections and they weren't returning the gesture. I dunno, having lived a little now I'm sure it was bordering on trivial. But I walked by the administrative secretary who said: "hey, how ya doin' today". To which I replied: "This is the worst day of my life"
She quickly responded: "trust me, there will be worse" And she was an eternal optimist!
How right she was!
My mom is in her 80's. I'm the youngest of seven. She is being such a wonderful mommy right now, even though my family lives 1000's of miles away. When something like this happens part of you (if your the baby of the family) knows that feeling where you just want to be looked after.
Ok, enough naval gazing kiddo. In 5 days you'll have the wires cut and move over to rubber bands for a few weeks. Maybe I'll be able to pull my jaw apart wide enough to put a little tiny spoon in and eat something like pudding.
I've lost considerable weight by now which I can't really afford to loose. I do have some of those Meal Replacement shakes but they are pretty intense (and expensive!). I'm such a chef, I just don't feel like sucking back a quick sugary sweet pre made drink, no matter how many "complete minerals" it says it has. Those suckers are gone in three gulps and an hour later your starving again.
As I type I am having my most recent craving. Rosebud beats (from the can) blended with steamed baby carrots, some ginger, nutmeg, cottage cheese, and hemp protein powder. Thanks to my reader who brought up hemp protein powder. I usually have some for my muffins (oh I miss my muffins!) so it works well in blended drinks.
I think that part of healing well means eating well. I can't really afford to be going off shopping for all of this stuff, but the opposite would mean disaster. I'm breathing deeply and trusting that somehow the Universe wants me to learn something from this. What's that saying "that which does not kill us makes us stronger".
Listen to me! Self indulgent pitying I suppose. I'm not a miner stuck in a mine in Cuba for months. But in my own little world this is my reality. I'm not the first person to be saddled with unexpected massive bills that will be followed by massive debt. I'm inspired by those who have rebuilt their lives on this weekend, the anniversary of Katrina, and think of those who still have so far to go to rebuild. It is humbling.
The Show must go on....that's always been my motto. I hope I find my voice again. It's an important part of my anatomy. One thing is for sure...I'm simply not opening my mouth with all of these smashed teeth.
How can I get on one of those make over shows! Hello...any producers out there! This would be your before shot. (sorry, couldn't open my mouth wide enough to show you all the wires for busted teeth. (now did you really need to see this I ask myself?)
